When Boys Play Dress-up

Both of our boys drive me slightly crazy (er, even more crazy) when they insist on seeing pictures on the camera every.single.time that I take a picture.  Seriously.  It's annoying.  I've decided recently though to just embrace their silliness in an effort to at least get the occasional really good picture in the midst of the silliness.  I have to admit that it's better to take four "silly pictures" for every one serious picture while they enjoy themselves, rather than deal with grumpiness, tears, anger, and flat-out refusals to have their pictures taken - which is what we dealt with (...and continue to deal with) with Mackenzie.

Tonight, the boys got into all their "dress-up" stuff.  They were insisting that I "take a picture", "take a picture", with every new outfit and every silly idea that they came up with.  I must say, the pictures are not the super adorable, sweet pictures that I have of Mackenzie when she was their age, wearing her little princess outfits, her dress-up shoes, her purses, hats, and necklaces, but they ARE cute....in a boy sort of way!  ;-)

Here they are, in all their boy-ness!

Markos as a knight

The obligatory "silly picture" following the knight picture

Daniel as a TMNT

Kenzie trying to get a hug

Daniel - still being a turtle

Daniel as a ??soldier??

My favorite of all the pictures!  Oh, the faces that Markos makes!!

I swear Daniel really isn't a violent kid, he just plays one in pictures!

Doesn't everyone feel the need to shoot firemen?  :-)

hee hee -- Another favorite

Do you see how happy Markos is about stopping the silliness for another hug?

Hmmm.  Interesting competition.  Hockey player vs. Knight

Take that!  A guitar to the head.  Thank goodness for helmets!

Yea.  They only pretend sleep.

And Markos doesn't really even pretend sleep very well!

But Markos DOES find Daniel to be hilarious!

The drama King

Do you see how concerned Eric is with all of this violence?

Homework I'm Happy Not to Help With

The older that Mackenzie gets, the less capable I am of helping her with her homework.  This is why (er, at least one of the reasons why) I'm grateful that I have a very smart husband who is a wonderful compliment to me.  You know -- I'm organized; he's creative.  I'm responsible; he's fun.  :-) 

Seriously though, given the fact that, for some reason when Daniel gets home from school, chaos breaks out every day and continues straight through until bedtime, I'm very happy to have a husband who is capable of and willing to help Mackenzie with things like projects and advanced math (which, just for the record, I could do back in the day.  However, my brain is now fried and it would take a lot of 'remembering' for me to be able to do it again, which means I'd definitely need more than 3 hours of sleep on average each night in order for it to happen and unfortunately, I don't see that happening anytime soon!!)

Recently, the two of them have spent many hours out working in the new shed on her big science project which is due on Friday.  They're doing a physics unit and were required to design and make a Rube Goldberg machine.  If you don't know what that is, Wikipedia describes it as:

A Rube Goldberg machine, device, or apparatus is a deliberately over-engineered machine that performs a very simple task in a very complex fashion, usually including a chain reaction.  The expression is named after American cartoonist and inventor Rube Goldberg.  Since then, the expression has expanded to denote any form of overly confusing or complicated system.

 As I read that definition, I have to chuckle just a little thinking that this was the PERFECT project for Eric to help with.  :-D

Anyway, they did a great job and had fun working on it together.  Dad/daughter quality time at it's best!  Mackenzie designed it, they tweaked her design together, came up with how to build it, and then went to work together.  It turned out very cool and they managed to get their first successful runs tonight and were able to videotape it for her class.  Good thing the teacher allows them to videotape any large projects or projects that can't easily be moved to the school.  I don't think they'd want to risk the mess with Mackenzie dropping Mentos into Diet Coke in the classroom.  Yep, leave it to Eric and Mackenzie to incorporate this into the machine.  It's cool, but if you ask me, a waste of some perfectly good Diet Coke.  (See?  This is why it's good that he helps with these things!)

And there you have it!

My Sweet Boy, Emama's Not Going to Starve!

 Just a short update on Markos' adjustment in the eating arena.  Thankfully, week by week, things are getting easier.  He's still extremely picky, but at least the fear of starving and the panic it brought about has disappeared.  I no longer have to continually offer Markos food.  He will come to me if he's hungry in between meal times.  He will also stop eating if he's full instead of cleaning his plate every time he's given food.  He will even choose playing over eating at times if he's having fun.

I no longer have to load his plate to overflowing with food, most of which I knew he wasn't going to like and therefore wasn't going to eat.  When he first came, he insisted on "tilick food"  (big food) every time I fed him.  If I only put a small amount on his plate for him to try, he would cry; insist on "tilick, tilick"; get angry; insist "NO TINNISH!"  (no little); swing at the table, at me, at his plate.  Now, he understands when I say, "try it and see if you like it.  You can have more if you like it."  He has even stopped checking, "tinnish, more?" when I do that - meaning, 'I will try just a little but I can have more, right?'.  I can now bargain with him over the foods that I know he likes to get him to try new things - ie. if you eat one bite of broccoli, you can have more baked beans.

Here are some of his favorites:

• bananas
• chicken nuggets & fries from Chick-fil-A (but ONLY from Chick-fil-A!  He "no like different chicken" - aka chicken nuggets from any other fast food restaurant)  :-)
• waffles (breakfast EVERY morning)
• dabbo (bread - but only the whole grain wheat bread or cinnamon bread)
• sega (meat - plain, cut up hamburgers)
• shy (hot tea - which he drinks every morning also)
• apple juice (thank goodness that we have been able to transition him to apple juice from the super thick mango juice and papaya juice that he drank when we first came home)
• Ethiopian food (I have almost used up that which I froze before we left so I guess it's time to make some more or to go back to the ET restaurant!)
• corn chips with spicy salsa (I have resorted to counting this as a vegetable.  If the schools can count ketchup as a vegetable, then I can count salsa!  I actually buy the all natural, organic salsa which contains nothing more than tomatoes, onions, peppers, vinegar, and spices so I think it's justified!)
• chicken with rice
• baked beans

He still hates:

• all things vegetable!  (seriously, I haven't found a vegetable yet that he will eat - aside from the previously mentioned 'salsa vegetable')
• most things potato (potato chips even repulse him, but he will eat fries)
• all dairy (he won't eat cheese, won't drink milk, doesn't like yogurt)
• onions and garlic (with a passion!!  He smells almost everything before he eats it and I am not kidding, if it has garlic or onion, he almost always wrinkles up his nose, makes his yuck face, and refuses to try it.  Only exception thus far - the salsa vegetable!)
• most new things or things that look different

So, it's going ok.  I'm praying it continues to get easier and he starts eating more soon because with Eric's food allergies and all of Daniel's food allergies, I really don't need another picky eater in the house.

But, here's the interesting thing that I have picked up on over the past few weeks.  Markos gets very concerned if I don't eat when he eats.  I noticed it a while ago, but didn't really put it together until recently.  If I give him lunch, and I'm not hungry but sit with him at the table, he will keep insisting, "Emama eat".  Even if he's eating his very favorite food and is hungry, he will try to give me some of his food.  "Emama eat!".  A week ago, I got out a bag of Twizzlers and there were only 3 left.  I had already eaten one before he came over, so I gave him the 2 that were left.  He was totally excited and happy to get the two, until he saw that there were none left.  Then, with a sad face, he gave me one of his, insisting, "Emama eat".  I told him it was ok, that he could have it, but he kept insisting, "Emama eat".  I told him I already ate one, that it was ok, but he was still insisting, "Emama eat".

I can see the fear and the hurt in his beautiful eyes when he says it - "Emama eat".  He knows hunger.  He's lived it.  He's had one Emama give her food for him and his brothers and sisters to eat.  He lost her.  He doesn't want to lose another Emama, so he'll give his food now.  Oh my poor sweet boy, this Emama's not going to starve.  Trust me.  I could stand to skip a few meals, but I'll be sure to do it when you won't notice so you won't worry about me.  I'm always happy to eat some chips and salsa with you!!  After all, it IS a vegetable, so it's healthy, right?!

Say Yes!!

Oh, how my heart breaks for children who don't have a family.

Say Yes!!

And this.....

Can become this....
 

This....

Can become this...

Say yes and be blessed!!

Blog Change & Brag Alert!

Here's the deal:  I realize this blog was started to allow our friends and family to follow along with our adoption journey.  Well, as of this past Thursday when I drove to the Social Security office with Certificate of Citizenship in hand and had Markos' official status of his Social Security number changed to that of "citizen", our adoption is now complete.  Therefore, the way I see it, there are 3 options: 

1) End the blog.
2) Only continue to post about Markos' adjustment and life with our family (which hardly seems fair when I have 2 other children!), or
3) Switch the entire blog focus over to being about our family as a whole.

Because I find that blogging is kind of fun, and it is a very easy way to share pictures and videos with our family and friends, and if I ever get inspired to start writing again, it will give me an avenue to do so, I figure that we'll go with Option #3.

Therefore, I bring you the first Brag About Mackenzie post!  :-)  If you were only here to read the adoption details, attempt to discern Ethiopia travel tips, or determine what you might be dealing with if you choose to adopt an older child, you might want to stop reading now.  If, however, you just like to read about other people's lives, families, kids and their accomplishments, read on!

Mackenzie is our oldest child.  She is super smart (as in, took the SATs as a 7th grader and scored higher than almost 60% of all college-bound Seniors in the state of PA); and she is very sweet (was just voted "Friendliest Student" by her 8th grade class for the yearbook).  She is also very quiet and shy, and, like her mom, HATES being in front of people or the center of attention.

Mackenzie started taking piano lessons in kindergarten.  She took for a few years, but then, due to a combination of dislike of practicing and a dislike of having to participate in recitals, she stopped taking lessons (much to her father's and my disappointment because she was very good and we loved that she was learning to play).  Thankfully, back in December, she decided that she wanted to start playing again.  We were thrilled.  Her previous instructor did not have any openings in her lesson schedule, so we found a new teacher.  Mackenzie is doing wonderfully and really enjoying playing again.  No longer do I have to nag at her to practice; Eric bought her a full-sized keyboard for her room so she was thrilled; and Mackenzie really likes the new teacher.

We made a deal when she started back - naively I said, "I really just want you to learn to play piano.  If you really, really do not want to participate in the recitals, we won't make you."  (honestly, I really didn't think that a lot of the teachers had recitals, so I didn't think it would be an issue.  Ha!)  So, we go to the new teacher's studio for the first lesson and after talking to the teacher and reading through all the materials she gave us, we discovered that she has not one, but two recitals a year AND she is a member of several different piano teachers' organizations and music organizations and therefore asks some of her students whom she thinks will do well, to participate in competitions throughout the year.  I was honest with her and told her of Mackenzie's dislike of performing in front of people and she assured us that she really tries to make sure that it's all very low-key and non-stressful.  (ummm...apparently, she doesn't know people who have a tremendous fear of  dislike being up in front of people like Mackenzie and I do).

Wouldn't you know that Mackenzie pretty much picked right back up where she left off with her lessons and, in less than a month, finished the lesson book that she was on and moved up to the next book.  So, her teacher asked her to consider participating in the Junior Festival held by the National Federation of Music Clubs and then tried to comfort her with the knowledge that, "well, you may as well, because our spring recital is the next day so you'll already have to learn two pieces to play for that the next day anyway".   (uh oh.)

Actually, I did honor my original proclamation and did tell Mackenzie that if she didn't want to do it that she didn't have to (although I might have urged her a LOT little to go ahead and do it).  I am happy to report that given her teacher's assurance that she would do very well and my encouragement (?) to go ahead and do it, she decided to participate in both. 

Yesterday, we drove to Westminster Presbyterian Church where she competed in the "solo piano" and "theory" competitions at the festival.  The theory portion was a written test on music theory.  For the solo piano portion, she had to memorize and play 2 pieces chosen from a list of acceptable pieces for her skill level and then she had to go into a room with a panel of 2 judges (neither of which was her piano teacher) and play the 2 pieces for them.  They then rate her in several areas and provide comments and feedback on her playing and give her a "rating".  Each rating is assigned a certain number of points, and as the students earn points through the years, they earn "Gold Cup" trophies of varying sizes.  The competition is only with themselves, for them to grow as musicians, NOT a competition against other musicians who are participating.

I went with Mackenzie to the festival and was allowed to go into the room with her.  I thought she did fantastic.  The first piece sounded perfect; the second piece had a very small error near the end, but it was not a glaring error at all and, being a non-musical person, I wasn't even certain it WAS an error, it sounded more to me like, 'hmmm, that sounded a little weird. I wonder if it was supposed to sound like that.'  She assured me that she was "horrible" and that "she messed up".  (yep - she got her perfectionism from me, too.  Poor thing.)

Today, we had her recital at Bethel Bible Church in Peters.

Mackenzie's recital

Thankfully, the instructor divides her students into two separate recitals so we don't have to sit through several hours of piano playing by a large number of students with a wide range of ability levels.  :-)
Kenzie did a great job again.  You can listen for yourself.




And, best of all, her teacher had the results of yesterday's festival already.  Mackenzie received the highest possible rating, "Superior", in both Theory and in Solo Piano, receiving the highest number of points possible for 2 events.  She only needs 5 more points to earn her first Gold Cup.

Kenzie receiving her "Superior" award certificates

OK, this proud momma is finished bragging about her daughter for the night.  (Although, in my defense, I was asked and did assure my mom and dad that I would record the recital for them to see, and besides, you didn't have to keep reading, YOU WERE WARNED!)

Mackenzie and Mrs. Priano relaxing after the recital

"Tickle-ie Me"

Just a short post today about tickling.  I don't remember if I told you all or not, but when Eric and I visited Markos for the first time in Ethiopia for our court trip, we thought that he was not ticklish at all.  Seriously, not at all.  In fact, we were a little freaked out by it.  We had never seen a child who was not ticklish anywhere, at all.  And believe me, Eric tried.  He tickled the back of Markos' neck, his underarms, his sides, his belly, his knees, his feet.  He tickled him while we were playing, while he was sitting on our laps relaxing.  We laughed and acted silly, trying to get a response, but nothing.  No giggles, no laughs, not even any squirming to get away.  Just flat, unmoving, nothing.  He would just sit there and look at us.

I hate to admit it but we actually wondered if there was some sort of biological/cultural difference.  Could Americans be ticklish and Africans not?  (I know - we're idiots!)

My dad tickles Daniel all the time.  It's sort of 'their thing'.  When Daniel is acting grumpy or mischievous, Dad will tease him and say, "I know what you need...." (at which time Daniel will start to run away)....as Dad finishes, "a good ticklin'!", and within seconds, he'll have Daniel on the ground, rolling around, laughing his head off, begging for mercy.  Bad mood averted.  So, when we came home and told Dad that Markos was not ticklish at all, he said, "eh, I'll get him to laugh!"  And, we assured him, "no, seriously, he isn't ticklish at all.  We tried everything."

Well, guess what?  Turns out that Markos IS ticklish!  Like, REALLY ticklish!  You should see me try to put lotion on this boy every day when I get him dressed!  Some days, I find it funny.  Other days, I want to rip my hair out of my head - yep, it's that bad.  Think: combination of laughing rag doll and fish flopping around out of water while lotion is getting on my arms, my clothes, the carpet...pretty much everything EXCEPT Markos!

The other day, I had Daniel at the doctor's office and Markos was with me.  The doctor thought that Daniel might have mono and Daniel had been having side/stomach pain, so he had Daniel lay on the table so he could feel around his belly to make sure that his liver and spleen were not enlarged.  The second Markos saw Daniel pull up his shirt and saw the doctor pushing around his stomach, he yanked his shirt up, and with a giant grin, was saying "tickle-ie me! tickle-ie me!".  I laughed and tried to explain that the doctor wasn't tickling Daniel, but Markos just continued, "tickle-ie me, tickle-ie Markos!"  So, what's a mom to do?  I started to tickle him until he dropped to the floor in hysterics.

The doctor thought it was funny.  And, it WAS super cute (although, yuck, who knows what sort of germs were on that floor?!)   Mostly though, I just marvel at the fact that Markos was apparently so on-guard in Ethiopia when we first met him that his tickle response was just completely turned "off".   And, I'm very thankful that he feels safe enough now to let his guard down, let his ticklishness show itself, and let his laughter roar -- except when I'm trying to put on his lotion, then it's just annoying.

Being silly when I was trying to get him to let me see his belly!

Laughing at himself, because he IS a clown!

Finally, showing you all his "tickle-ie me" invitation.

Say What?

I know that lots of you were curious about the communication issues when we were planning to bring Markos home.  I have to say, I was a little nervous about it myself.  Turns out, it hasn't been much of an issue at all.

It is amazing how quickly they pick up the language.  Yesterday, I had Daniel at the doctor's office and Markos was with me.  After a while, our pediatrician asked, "has he always spoken English?".  I laughed and said no, that it was actually his third language and he's only 4 years old.  The doctor marveled at the fact that Markos spoke very little English when he arrived just 6 1/2 weeks ago.  He said, "we really are pathetic here in the United States when it comes to languages."   Well, I don't know about all of us here in the United States, but I know that I am!  My brain just isn't what it once was, so I'm thankful that Markos' brain still has those connections fully intact!  

In fact, we received a gift in the mail the other day from a friend in Ethiopia.  He sent us a book that he described to me in an email as being "really easy and good for beginners who want to learn Amharic".  Well, the book arrived.  It is entitled, "Amharic for Foreign Beginners".  Well, let me tell you, I'm foreign and I'm a beginner, but this book is not easy!  At least not for me.

Markos is stringing 3 - 4 words together in sentences now.  It's cute because he will mix up the 3 languages and a sentence might contain some English words, some Amharic words and some Wolaytigna.   A common sentence would be something along the lines of, "Emama, imbi Markos mahtah mahtah"  (Momma, no Markos night night) or "Markos imbi brush teeth" (Markos no brush teeth).  

Markos desperately wants to go to school and ride on the bus.  In fact, I suspect he's going to be one of those kids who wants to be doing something at all times.  (ugh!  Not what this homebody of a mom wants to discover!)  He hates when we stay home and always wants to be going and doing something.  Unfortunately, the weather has been terrible and there really isn't much to do!  I can't wait until the weather breaks a little so we can go to the zoo and to the park and so I can work in the yard while he plays outside.  He'll be happier.  I'll be happier.  Things will be quieter.  The house will stay cleaner.  ;-)

We haven't gone to too many places with Markos yet.  We've been out to eat a good bit.  We've been shopping.  And, we go to church.  Markos still does not like talking to strangers at all.  If he does respond (which is rare), he will usually only do so while looking away.  I wish more people understood this and didn't jump to conclusions about things that they know nothing about.  People assume that he's being rude or grumpy or just plain difficult.  Case in point, the other day at the grocery store, Markos was riding in the cart.  I had a HUGE order.  We were checking out.  He had been perfectly well-behaved the entire time we were there, laughing and talking to me, pointing things out to me.  Then, when we are checking out , the bagger lady comes over and says to him, "hey there!  how are you?" and he kept staring straight ahead at me and wouldn't look at her.  She tapped his arm and said, "hey buddy, what's up?" and at that, he pulled away from her and made a screech noise, clearly not interested in talking or being touched.  She looks at me and raises her eyebrows in a disgusted way and says, "welllll, SOMEONE'S in a mood today."  I just looked at her and said, "no, actually he's in a perfectly good mood.  He's just quiet and doesn't want to talk."  (I refrained from adding "...to you." although I really wanted to.)

A few cute things that he says:
"fleas" = please
"mini-bus-ie" = all buses, trucks, vehicles
"Daniel nice?" = hey Daniel, will you please let me play your Nintendo DS?
"Dawit & Dawit Too" =  what he calls the identical twins (Dawit & Israel) who were adopted at the same time he was
"soon?  soon Emama?" = You'll be back soon, right, Mama?!!  (asked about 4,000X each night that I leave to go to my class)

As I think I've already shared, Markos is obsessed with the electronic toys in the house.  He plugs them in and charges them totally on his own.  He asks me, "charge?".  He also talks about going to church, which leads to confusion.  "Church" and "charge" sound very much the same.

The Sunday before last, I was teaching his age group's Sunday School class, so he stayed in the class with me.  It was the first time he had been downstairs where the kids' classes are.  He loved the toys, of course.  But I was still shocked when the next Sunday, he actually asked me, "Markos downstairs?".  My friend was teaching the class so I said, "sure, you can go downstairs if you want to".  (Restraining myself from jumping up and down and pleading, "yes, yes, yes!!!! Oh please, please, go downstairs during the service!")  I took him down and he happily started playing and didn't cry at all when I left.  I was shocked.  I went upstairs and was able to relax during the worship music at the start of the service (except when Kenzie spilled her entire glass of orange juice on my legs).  Then, the helper came up to get me because Markos was upset.  It was very crowded in his class that day.  He made it for about 15 minutes and was having fun until another girl got upset and started crying and then things got chaotic.  He only made it 15 minutes, but it was a fun 15 minutes for him and a relaxing 15 minutes for me.  It was a start, and it was mostly a positive experience for him, so I look for it to gradually increase without too much trauma (for me or him!)

And, you know, I think it's funny that "charge/church" sound exactly the same when he says them, because you know, that IS what church and being in the Word of God does for me.  It charges me up.  It gives me what I need to get through another day.  Every year, I struggle with the whole Lent thing - do I give something up, do I add something in, do I do nothing?  I've attended different churches with different ideas about what this time should be about.  This year, I decided to add something in -- something that will help to keep me 'charged' during this continued transition time with Markos and our family adjusting to becoming a family of 5.  I'm finishing a Beth Moore study that I started a few years ago and never finished - David:  90 days with a Heart Like His.  Additionally, I will continue to look towards the future when Markos happily scampers off to the downstairs kid's classes at church so I can focus and enjoy the fellowship, worship, and Bible study at church on Sunday mornings to get all charged up and ready to face another week.


I tried to videotape Markos talking and saying "church" and "charge" so you could hear for yourself, but this was the best I could do.  You can still hear him say it at the beginning and hear his cute little voice, which is good because, odds are, if you happen to be around him anytime soon, he is NOT going to talk to you, and no, it won't be because he's in a mood or being rude, it will be because he just went through yet another ENORMOUS change in his short little life, so he's a little leery of new people.  :-)

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, 

for he who promised is faithful. 

And let us consider how we may spur one another on 

toward love and good deeds, 

not giving up meeting together, 

as some are in the habit of doing, 

but encouraging one another—

and all the more as you see the Day approaching. 

Hebrews 10:23-25